Most working adults report spending very little time with friends and family. The current research examines which aspects of work encourage employees to spend less time with their close ties. We show that incentive systems play a critical role in shaping how people allocate their time to different relationship partners. Across three experiments, one survey, and one large-scale archival data set (n = 77,304), exposure to performance incentives encouraged employees to spend more time with their work colleagues, even when it prevented them from spending more time with their friends and family. This is because performance incentives led employees to perceive their work relationships as more instrumental. These findings suggest that incentive systems shape employees’ perceptions of and interactions with critical relationship partners.